as you might have heard, it's the year of St. Joseph!

IMPORTANT NOTE:

The platform that I’ve been using for the past nine years – Blogger – is doing away with the “follow by email” widget that allows you (if you’re interested!) to receive my Day by Day with Maria Blog as an email. The bottom line is that, come July, you will NOT be receiving my blog as an email whenever I have a new post.  

 

I am pondering what options I have available, but so far nothing stands out. The most likely scenario is that I have to change sites… so, stay tuned, and I will keep you posted! 

 

Repeat after me… Change is good change is good change is good change is good change is good…

 

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"To other saints the Lord seems to have given grace to succor us in some of our necessities but of this glorious saint my experience is that he succors us in them all and that the Lord wishes to teach us that as He was Himself subject to him on earth (for, being His guardian and being called His father, he could command Him) just so in Heaven He still does all that he asks. This has also been the experience of other persons whom I have advised to commend themselves to him; and even to-day there are many who have great devotion to him through having newly experienced this truth." 

 

~St.Teresa of Avila on her devotion to St. Joseph

 

 

When my son and his wife had their first baby, one of my closest friends enjoyed referring to them as my holy family. “How is your holy family?” “When will you see your holy family again?” When they had twins a couple of years later, she switched to calling them my holy trinity of grandkids. 

 

Rather than detracting from the theological significance of these concepts, using these meaningful faith labels to describe my personal family brought the ideas to life in a unique way for me. 

 

My son’s family certainly was – and remains – a symbol of all “holy families,” ordinary mothers and fathers striving to live holy lives as they put into practice their faith within the quotidian and ordinary work of our lives. 

 

In Patris corde (With a Father’s Heart), an apostolic letter which Pope Francis wrote against the backdrop of the Covid-19 pandemic, the Holy Father emphasized that our shared experience of the pandemic has helped us see more clearly the importance of “ordinary” people who, though far from the limelight, exercise patience, perseverance, faithfulness, and offer daily hope to those around them.

 

In this way, said Pope Francis, they resemble Saint Joseph, “the man who goes unnoticed, a daily, discreet and hidden presence – an intercessor, a support and a guide in times of trouble. Saint Joseph reminds us that those who appear hidden or in the shadows can play an incomparable role in the history of salvation. A word of recognition and of gratitude is due to them all.”

 

I find especially profound the images where St. Joseph is depicted actively taking care of his family: The flight into Egypt; walking to Bethlehem; Teaching Jesus carpentry. There is one illustration, in particular, that I place prominently over my mantle every Christmas season. It depicts Mary in the background, enjoying much-needed rest after giving birth, and Joseph holding newborn Jesus in his arms, lovingly gazing at him.  These are moments in the life of the holy family that I can connect with, instances where a mother and father quietly and faithfully live out their parenting vocation.

 

In his reflection about Joseph of Nazareth and “the mission entrusted to him by God’s providence,” Joseph was for Jesus “the earthly shadow of the heavenly Father,” Pope Francis concluded. “He watched over him and protected him, never leaving him to go his own way.” 

 

To serve in the shadows, while becoming earthly shadows of God for our families, this is the call for each of us, whatever our season of life. 

 

And in this we grow in trust, like Joseph, whose every Gospel story concludes with: he gets up, takes Jesus and his mother, and does what God commanded of him.

 

St. Joseph, please pray for us, that we, too, may get up, 

serve our loved ones, and do the will of the Father.

 

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This column was first published in the May 2021 issue of Liguorian Magazine, as the regular  column, “Just Live It”

you can't fake surrender

“It is I” ~Mathew 14:27

“God is in all things, sustains all things, directs all things. [To] see his will in all things was to accept each circumstance and situation and let oneself be borne along in perfect confidence and trust… By renouncing, finally and completely, all control of my life and future destiny, I was… freed from anxiety and worry, from every tension, and could float serenely upon the tide of God’s sustaining providence in perfect peace of soul.” ~Walter J. Ciszek, S.J.

michael & michelle walking the Italian beach

It is often only in retrospect that life can be seen accurately. A good example is looking back and remembering the worse, most difficult, most painful moments in my life, or other critical life changing events.

Days, months, or more likely, years later, I eventually recognize that one of the graces—or dare I call them blessings? —of these moments is how clearly I later see the hand of God in the details of my life.

A few years when Michael, Michelle and I fell asleep on a deserted beach in southern Italy and, while we were sleeping, our travel bag stolen. Not only did the bag have our passports, money, credit cards, camera, it also had the keys to our rental car, so we weren’t going anywhere!

My honest but bold prayer that day still makes me laugh.  As I walked up and down the beach cussing under my breath and checking every trash bin in the hope that some of our things had been dumped and left behind, the words I burst out loud were more of a dare than a prayer: “Oh fine. Let’s see how you’re going to get us out of this one!”

In God’s eternal, faithful, and even humorous love, the answer was immediate.  A young couple down the beach came to ask how they could help us. They drove us to the nearby police station, and even took us to the flat that was our home for the week, even though it was several towns away. We are now Facebook friends with our Italian angels.

On a more serious note, during recovery from surgery on my cervical spine eight years ago, I remember feeling so completely empty, powerless, and broken that my only prayer was one of surrender. I felt lonely and vulnerable, yes. But I wasn’t asking God for help as much as keenly aware that only in Him, through Him, with Him, could I continue living. It was both sobering and liberating.

But why do I wait for a moment when I feel completely helpless to trust the God who loves me so faithfully day after day? How can I make the shift in attitude from having confidence in God because that’s what I should do—to truly and completely surrendering myself to God in trust with every detail of my life?

The thing is that I don’t want my actions and prayers to be based on a religious or pious definition of what or how a good Catholic Christian should act.

What I really want is that serenity Father Ciszek describes and that I've experienced during crisis, the type that frees me from anxiety and worry. I want to surrender to God—because I am loved, and that changes everything.

I want love to be my catalyst.

#SmallMerciesMiércoles: can I be grateful for change itself?

Rejoice in the Spring-time of the year. Let there be Spring-time in your hearts. The full time of fruit is not yet but there is the promise of the blossom. 

Know surely that your lives too are full of glad promise. Such blessings are to be yours. Such joys, such wonders. 

All is indeed well. Live in My Sunshine and My Love.

~April 30 entry in “God Calling,” 

edited by A.J. Russell

Spring-time in Oklahoma can mean just about anything. Cool temperatures. Warm weather. Dry conditions. Unceasing rain. 

Yet two variables seem constant lately:  unrelenting winds, and always, the possibility of serious storms.

The terrifying, destructive storms that hit across the southern states earlier this week left Oklahoma untouched this time.  And in spite of the wind that comes sweeping down the plains, just like the song “Oklahoma” promises, we’ve had gorgeous weather… mostly sunshine, beautiful cloud formations, and temperatures in the upper 50s and low 60s.

Much like the capricious Oklahoma weather, life can and does change in an instant. Without any warning, a storm can quickly develop, wrap its arms around me, and literally change my life forever.

Now be honest. What did you imagine when you read that sentence—something terrible or something amazing and good?  

Change can be either, or both!

On this #SmallMerciesMiércoles, I choose to be grateful for exactly that, the change itself. 

Whether good, bad, or yet unknown—I entrust it all to the One who loves me most, best, and forever.

jump into the river baby

I was barely halfway listening to the indie rock band Local Natives playing in the background, concentrating on the never-ending task of clearing my inbox. Then unexpectedly, a line caught my attention:

“Jump into the river baby

Easy as it sounds

It's never quite as easily done”

jumping into Rio Frio, Leakey, TX

I was so intrigued and thankful for the worthwhile excuse to procrastinate even further, that I took the time to look up the rest of the lyrics to “Who knows, Who Cares.” I found it impossible to resist the insight of the tune and its cleverly misleading title:

“You could let it down

Jump into the river baby

Easy as it sounds

It's never quite as easily done

The current has us now, it's okay

Take into account that it's all about to change

Who knows, who cares”

What a great metaphor for life, and in particular, for our spiritual journey. Easy as it sounds, it's never quite as easily done...

Yet faith is surely the ability to trust the river of life, to trust our loving Father, or paraphrasing Franciscan Richard Rohr, to trust the Flow, and the Lover.

Local Natives, "Who knows, who cares"

recorded live in Stockholm, 2013

when will I surrender?

“Come, let us bow down in worship;

let us kneel before the Lord who made us.

For he is our God,

and we are the people he shepherds, the flock he guides.”

~Psalm 95

Today I read in "Courage to Change" a reflection that culminated with the sentence: 

“Heaven forbid I should surrender, accept my discomfort, and pray for guidance.”

Surrender. Accept. Pray for guidance. I am struck by the simplicity and utter truthfulness of this formula. I am back to the first step, surrender. Always surrender. So today this is exactly what I do. I get on my knees and say out loud, 

“Into your hands, Lord, I surrender my body. Into your hands, I surrender my mind. Into your hands I surrender my spirit, my will, my desires, my worries, my hopes, my fears. I surrender my ideas and image of who I am, and I beg you to show me what you see. I surrender all of me. Grant me O my Lord the ability to accept, and, please guide me. Show me the way.”

Just saying the words, calls to mind a period in my life not so long ago when I struggled with surrender from a different and more poignant point of view--when my chronic joint pain and fatigue was in full flare up. 

After kneeling that night in prayer, I wrote in my journal:

My knees throb; uncomfortable in even the short time it takes me to pray. Before getting up, however, I hang my head and let myself cry. It’s hard to explain what’s going on inside me without sounding overly dramatic.  

It’s not that I can’t do it without God’s help—this I know to be true, but it’s not enough.  

It is rather that I acknowledge that I am literally unable, based on my own will, to live like this at all—and if I am to go on living today, and tomorrow, and the day after—it can only be resting in God’s guiding hand. 

the orbits of life

On February 20, 1962, astronaut John Glenn went into space aboard the Friendship VII Mercury capsule.

    51 years ago today, he traveled at 17,500 miles per hour 160 miles above Earth, orbiting the earth three times, and providing humans with their first glimpse of earth from the heavens:

"a brilliant blue" horizon; a continent "covered by... wispy high cirrus looking clouds"; Thunderstorms and lightning that looked "just like firecrackers going off."

    When I was young, I truly thought that by the time I was an adult my age the space age would have us connected to the moon, and perhaps nearby planets.

    Yes, I do love syfy, so my thinking is pre-ordained in this manner. But keep in mind that in “Back to the Future,” when Marty McFly traveled to the future, the year was 2012!

    Clearly, not all of us are called to travel to the heavens. But the directive to follow God is an invitation to trust our lives completely to the one who created us, regardless of what orbits life takes us.

    As our friend and Maronite priest Fr. Sami reminded me at yesterday’s daily Mass, if I claim to believe that God has known me and loved me from the time I was in my mother’s womb, how can I NOT trust the One who has loved me the longest and deepest of all?

    Alas, some days, all I can do is plead for the grace to say yes, again, and to desire to desire this with my whole being.