Tuesday, February 19, 2013

wrestling, seeking and humor

“…Jacob was left there alone. Then a man wrestled with him until the break of dawn. When the man saw that he could not prevail over him, he struck Jacob’s hip at its socket, so that Jacob’s socket was dislocated as he wrestled with him. The man then said, “Let me go, for it is daybreak.” But Jacob said, “I will not let you go until you bless me.” “What is your name?” the man asked. He answered, “Jacob.” Then the man said, “You shall no longer be named Jacob, but Israel, because you have contended with divine and human beings and have prevailed.” Jacob then asked him, “Please tell me your name.” He answered, “Why do you ask for my name?” With that, he blessed him. Jacob named the place Peniel, “because I have seen God face to face,” he said, “yet my life has been spared.”
 At sunrise, as he left Peniel, Jacob limped along because of his hip.”
Seeking is as good as seeing
during the time
God lets the soul labour
(ca. 1342-ca. 1416)
I have been in a funk, and not the musical kind.

At the risk of sounding vague, it’s not about any one thing in particular, and more about the big picture of my life. 

All I can say is that I’m prayerfully “working at” not going global or overgeneralizing, one of the anxiety-fueled thought patterns that I wrote about last week (which is my usual M.O). While at the same time acknowledging, pondering, sitting with the issues, the thoughts, that seem to bring out a significant emotion from me.

For example, when I reacted to a project proposal made by a young editor with what was unquestionably an unreasonable uproar, I eventually realized that what I was -- and am -- feeling has everything to do with my aging self—and nothing to do with the age of the editor, or the proposal.

I don’t know about you, but this sort of introspection takes a lot of energy. 

On Ash Wednesday, our pastor challenged each of us to take time each day – twice a day – over Lent to "take in" a dose of
G. F. H. = gratefulness, forgiveness, and HUMOR!

I’ll keep prayerfully pondering over the first two, but for now, here’s a dose of humor that always makes me laugh
Protestant heaven vs. Catholic heaven