rise up, pick up your mat, and go home

With no special goal or direction in mind, I was enjoying a slow-paced afternoon of meandering around the west wing of the Main Floor Gallery at the National Gallery of Art in Washington, D.C. 

Then I came around a corner and stopped, suddenly startled, facing a rendition by an anonymous artist of a familiar Gospel story, a painting I had never seen before:

I immediately recognized the image as the story of the paralytic-- one that is told again in today's Gospel, Mark 2:1-12. 

I found everything about this image provoking.  

In the past, when I have heard the healing of the paralytic story proclaimed at Mass, I always pictured a feeble man--and in my mind's eye, the man was carrying something small, maybe equivalent to a door mat! 

But our Lord is much more generous and merciful than my imagination.

Jesus healed the paralytic and brought him back to wholeness. He gave him the strength, energy, ability--everything he needed--to enable him to walk away with his mat and go back to his life... no matter how massive or heavy was the paralytic's old baggage!

Now let the images walk you through the Scripture:

When Jesus returned to Capernaum after some days,

it became known that he was at home.

Many gathered together so that there was no longer room for them,

not even around the door,

and he preached the word to them.

They came bringing to him a paralytic carried by four men.

Unable to get near Jesus because of the crowd,

they opened up the roof above him.

After they had broken through,

they let down the mat on which the paralytic was lying.

When Jesus saw their faith, he said to him,

“Child, your sins are forgiven.”

Now some of the scribes were sitting there asking themselves,

“Why does this man speak that way? He is blaspheming.

Who but God alone can forgive sins?”

Jesus immediately knew in his mind what 

they were thinking to themselves, 

so he said, “Why are you thinking such things in your hearts?

Which is easier, to say to the paralytic,

‘Your sins are forgiven,’

or to say, ‘Rise, pick up your mat and walk’?

But that you may know

that the Son of Man has authority to forgive sins on earth”

–he said to the paralytic,

“I say to you, rise, pick up your mat, and go home.”

He rose, picked up his mat at once, 

and went away in the sight of everyone.

They were all astounded

and glorified God, saying, “We have never seen anything like this.”

Netherlandish 16th Century (painter)

The Healing of the Paralytic, c. 1560/1590

oil on panel

National Gallery of Art, Washington, D.C. 

[I originally wrote about this painting in my blog October 25, 2012]

what I have is enough

Camino de Santiago, 2003

When my high school friend Jill and I were struggling teenagers, grappling and questioning what it means to have faith, Jill spoke words one night that sounded like aged wisdom—and I still remember them: 

“I think when we pray and ask God to give us faith we have to assume we already have it. Whatever grace we’re asking for, we already have it. What we have to do is claim it.”

I thought of Jill’s words about faith today as I read this provoking blog post in Patheos by Nadia Bolz Weber on this passage of the mustard seed: 

“I say to you, if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”

~Gospel of Matthew, chapter 17, verse 20

Rather than Jesus rubbing in their face the disciples' lack of faith, Weber argues that the question—and the real issue—is instead: “when they ask [Jesus] to increase their faith he’s affirming that the disciples already have the faith to do what is expected of them.”

She concludes with this beautiful statement:

"The faith of the Righteous then is not as much about never doubting as it is about having a heart which longs for that which it cannot create for itself…to be righteous is to be a person – to be a people – who take the promises of God seriously enough to be unafraid of lament. Who know that doubt is as much about being in relationship with God as faith is. And Jesus was right. Even if it’s a tiny mustard seed amount, it’s enough.  

So if things are hard. If you are struggling. If when it comes to God you feel more like complaining than commending, know that this too is faith. And that still it is enough.”

Also, I learned that mustard seed necklaces are a real thing.

To read Weber entire post, with an option to hear her preaching it, go here.

In a similar but different topic, a little green worm—or rather, a small battalion of four green worms, attacked overnight one of my basil plants, leaving it completely naked. 

In an effort to save my other two potted basil plants from the foraging green worms, I made some pretty delicious pesto last night. More on that later.

holy music video, Batman!

Why is it that I annoyingly forget the most simple, important things, and yet hearing one word or a phrase will remind me of a song—and immediately, without hesitation, I am able to recall all of its lyrics?

It can be a little embarrassing when it happens during Mass.

Today our pastor read a very stern passage from the Gospel of Matthew in which Jesus rebukes his listeners with severe, glaring words,

Jesus said,
“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, you hypocrites.
You are like whitewashed tombs, which appear beautiful on the outside,
but inside are full of dead men’s bones and every kind of filth.

But what my memory heard, and I pictured, was the Jesus in the musical Godspell yelling, "Alas, alas for you, hypocrites!" and it made me smile—just as Father continued reading,

Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, you hypocrites.
You build the tombs of the prophets
and adorn the memorials of the righteous,
and you say, ‘If we had lived in the days of our ancestors,
we would not have joined them in shedding the prophets’ blood.’
Thus you bear witness against yourselves
that you are the children of those who murdered the prophets;
now fill up what your ancestors measured out!”

Here’s a video of what I envisioned:

At the risk of being judged for my distractions during Mass, here are two more “Scripture-related music videos” that I think you'll enjoy. Yes, I wanted to sing it like the nuns in Sister Act:

Hail Holy Queen, from Sister Act

Thankfulness Song, Veggie Tales

mercy, not sacrifice

  

cross at Finisterre, España

“Jesus helped many people, but He was honest and straightforward about it. He didn’t persecute people after He helped them. And he asked them what they wanted from Him. Sometimes He asked why, too. He held people responsible for their behavior… I think [codependent] caretaking perverts Biblical messages about giving, loving, and helping.”

~Melody Beattie, "Codependent No More"

“Go and learn the meaning of the words, I desire mercy, not sacrifice" 

Gospel of Matthew 9:13 

I’ve usually heard these words, said by Jesus to the ever unpopular Pharisees, as some kind of criticism to them, an inside diss, if you will.

But today, as soon as I read this Gospel, I also heard my heart asking out loud—what do you really mean by that, Lord, that you desire mercy and not sacrifice?

The response was surprisingly immediate: the difference is in the attitude.

If I stop, pay attention, and I’m honest with myself, I know when my behavior—no matter how honorable it may seem—is based on an attitude of “sacrifice.”

When I act out of “sacrifice,” I’m often masking a myriad of other mindsets compelling my behavior. It’s often based on what author Melody Beattie describes in therapeutic jargon as behaving like a “victim,” usually acting out of a codependent “Drama Triangle.”

But let’s not get lost in that language either. 

The point is simple. My behavior can either reveal an attitude of “sacrifice,” centered on the self—or it can reflect a desire to act out of love, giving the self in freedom and authenticity.

This is the loving mercy God desires.

sounds of my backyard, where I do my pondering

I'll see you soon

Jesus said, “Let the children come to me, 

and do not prevent them; 

for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”   

~Gospel of Matthew, chapter 19, verse 14

Elena Clare is in town... 

so you won't be hearing from me for a few days!